Off the cuff replies like the previous two are neither constructive, nor helpful. Actually, the attorney may not have a choice about accepting service for her. It depends on the laws in your state. I would recommend submitting your question to:
Nat Denman Memorial Pro Se Group Self Representation (Pro Se) discussion, Questions, Answers. email@example.com
The late Nat Denman was the leading authority on Pro Se work. Many of his students who used his methods successfully are on this eGroup and they can offer answers to your questions.
Is there a reason why you cannot serve her in person? If it is because there is a restraining order, then use someone else to do it. I assume you have her address, but if it is only a PO Box, then take the papers to the post office and tell them that you need her actual address in order to serve court papers.
You should also consider joining a father’s group. There are many in the US. I am a board member of one that is nationwide. The National Congress for Fathers & Children is a 20 year old organization. We provide a membership manual that covers most everything you need to know in dealing with your case, including a section on Pro Se. To see more info on it go to http://www.kclawandmediation.com/. The latter one has sample of the manual on it.
If you have any other questions, put them here, or you can call me at (913) 385-DADS from 4-midnight east coast time.